Dear Kitchen Elf,
We know you exist. You may have tried to keep your existence a secret, but let’s be frank: you did a pretty poor job of it.
Your presence was made obvious by the fact that our utensils, especially the vegetable peeler, keep disappearing from their assigned drawers. I’m not doing it, and Brian says he’s not either, so clearly you are the one moving our utensils. I’m sure you think it’s funny to watch us search for the vegetable peeler on a daily basis.
Just like you think that putting spells on our appliances is funny. You make our refrigerator shrink while I’m grocery shopping so there’s no room for my purchases when I return home and cause our stove top to never have the correct burner turned on. Moving tools is one thing, but playing with appliances that belong to our landlord is an entirely different matter.
Speaking of grocery shopping, I also know you’re hiding things in our pantry. I check to see what we have before I go food shopping, so why do we suddenly have 5 cans of tomatoes when I just went and bought 4 more? Items that I was sure we had seem to mysteriously disappear as well. Please stop rearranging and/or hiding our food (or eating it, if that’s the case).
Honestly though, you keep things interesting around here. It’s good to know that it’s not Brian or I doing any of the above behaviors. And we wouldn’t mind you sticking around. We just have one request: once in a while, could you please do the dishes?